Grip Onto Reality, or Else no Ramen!
by DarkSeraph1127
Summary: Enter Riikanochan's life. At first, when she thought all bad things could get any worse, she somehow lands in the world of Naruto. What she thinks that might be her end,but in reality...it is only the beginning!KakashixOcxIruka
1. WHY MEEEE?

Menchi's Revenge: Hello, people. 'Tis I, someone who always too lazy too write anything…anyways, I was singing to a few Shakira and Mecano Songs--and got randomly inspired…while drinking Dr. Pepper with Cherry and Vanilla…mmm…..vaniiiiiilaaaaa……drool. I came up with this after a ride in my friend's car.

She and her grandma were talking about the good things of life while the tiny rag doll (me) just though about what there is to ponder of life. Basically, you are born, you go to school, high school, college, get a good job or not, get laid before 30, and die. Pretty stupid, but it's not my fault.

**_YOU ARE ALL FREE TO SHOOT ME WITH WATERMELONS! _****_© © _**

_Anyways….._I am writing this out of pure, dumb inspiration. Please enjoy…

Menchi: Arf, arf, arf, arf. Arf, arf, arf, arf. (Please know that this---Naruto show is not owned by M-chan. If she did---it would be very painful….)

Excel: Menchi! There you are! Come 'ere!

Menchi: ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF, ARF! RUFF, RUFF, RUF! (OH NO! IT'S HER! THE CRAZED DOG EATER! SOMEONE PLEASE SAVE ME! I WANT TO LIVE!)

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**Grip Onto Reality, or Else no Ramen!**

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**_Lesson For the Day!_Chapter One: WHY IS IT ALWAYS MEEEEEEEE!**

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_Slurp, slurp, slurp._

_Chew, chew, che---CHOKE!_

_Gulp, gulp, aahhhh!_

Yes. This was the ordinary, plain boring life of me. Notice the past tense---_was. _Yeah. Ohhhhhh----yeah. This is what I was doing before I fucking got stuck in the middle of a forest. And….I'm eating ramen noodles. Beef-style! A forest, you ask? I'm eating beef-ramen…? Of course. Why is this happening? That's what I'd like to know too. Why am I stuck in a forest…and eating ramen-shrimp style? I don't know, but here's how it started. I woke up in the morning and rushed myself as usual….And before we start with how I got stuck here in the first place, let me introduce myself.

Hello, my name is Riikano Kisaragi. I'm 23, and work in a company that pays good money. And guess what? I am the vice-president of that company! Yes! Ms. Riikano Kisaragi, vice-president of Mineshouno Products Corps.! Nice ring to it, eh? Any ways, I'm 5'9--yes, I'm short.--have long hair that seems to have a crimson glow in it, and I have eyes that people call mystic.

They are a very dark red. Redder than blood from the nearest K.O.'ed pervert across the street. And I am an anime fanatic. Yes. I practically bring **ALL **of my graphic novels with me. Same goes with the posters and other things. Hey, you never know when the apartment blows up. I have even the oldest, rarest, things of anime. And that's why I take them with me.

I am also a pro at ninjutsu. -----pause

(Menchi: I know this sounds stupid, but I like "trying" to practice ninjutsu. That's why I placed that here. Ok, ok---I'm not making the character **_perfect_**. She's going to have a few flaws, here and there, and that's it. I am not pitying her also. SO DON'T MAKE ME THE SUSPECT!)

un-pause

--Yes. Ninjutsu. Karate, tai-kwando, jui-jutsu, kick-boxing, aikido, judo--you name it. Hell, call me a tomboy! I don't care if other girls think I act like a guy; 'cause you know what? The minute they go out onto the street, they get kidnapped, or get drunk, and they get raped. Then , cry that they are now, **_not pure. And then they regret calling me a tomboy! _**My body, however is a weapon, ever since I took lessons like those. (LOL) Along with Jeffery, my metal chocobo! Or pipe. And, I crave for chocolate.. I use it when in doubt. I love rock guitars too…sigh…. Yeah….that's about it. Now back onto the plot!

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7:03 A.M.--TOKYO, JAPAN--NASASHIKI CONDOMINIUMS--ROOM 708, FLOOR FIVE---**_

"NOOOOOO! SHIT, SHIT! I'm gonna be late!" , here I go, pulling my skirt up yelling, and trying to get my shirt too. Ahh--yes. This is heaven.

"WHERE THE HELL IS MY SOCK?"

Total heaven.

"NO! MY TOAST! WHAT AM I GONNA EAT!"

My….what a marathon!

_**BEEP! BEEP! BEEE---SMASH!**_

"STUPID CLOCK---"

My point exactly, babe!

Here we are. Now what do all these sound make you think? Am going on a date? Is it the yearly WWE Wresting Championship visiting? Or maybe…is it the tooth fairy? Trying to pull my tooth out without a license? At 7 a.m.? Hell, no. It's neither. Not even one applies to this situation. I am only late for work…again for some reason. Right now, I'm jumping up and down, pulling my stocking and trying to find the other stocking. Of, course…I am late for work. Mr. Niwasaki is probably fuming like hell in his office. Tuesdays, mind you are neither good for him and I. Shoot…where's my other sock--ahaha! Sneaky little bastard---OH NO! I'M SCREWED FOR SURE! Running down the stairs on high heels---

(Menchi: HIGH HEELS? WOOOT, WOOT, WOOOT! YOU GO GIRL! I CAN'T EVEN RUN IN STYLETTOS! Whoops…heh, heh, heh….)

--I managed not to get hurt, and ran for the first floor. My suitcase, now rummaged with papers and crap shook wildly. My poor, clammy hands squeezed the life out of the handle…and my hair was a mess. A bird's nest could compare better to me. Man…I should have taken the elevator--oh wait…it's not working. Shoot, either way, it wouldn't go as fast as I did, running a 345 mph track marathon. Yes…a fine trail of sweat trailed down my forehead as I zipped out of the flight of---700 or something stairs, and got my keys out to drive the car. A beauty of a car, really…now that I'm furiously turning and twisting the key, I will now say…that…I---am…okay!

SNAP! TINK, TINK, TINK……..

My eyes widened in horror, and I think my bill for the car key will be my end. I have just broken the key, I am 1 hour late…my---could my day get any better? I woke up late, ran down the stairs in high heels without breaking a sweat--which is very rare…I usually get hurt--, and now…NOW…I broke my car key. And my car's beeping. Boo-hoo…boo-hoo….Waaaaaah…..! Now what? Im going to be late! NO, shit, I'm already late…I ruffled my hair and slipped on the floor. I was gonna try running, but that's out of the question. There's major traffic, and I have no friends. Yes, I'm friendless. What do you expect?

I sighed in self pity, and cried. Why was this happening to me? I am usually the early bird, there's never any problem getting my car open, and---and…and what? Of course, there's nothing more. God, I hope the boss doesn't call or anything. Or worse…fire me. The worse thing besides not getting laid--which, I don't care much about--, is getting fired from a good job. What do I work as, anyway? I am the secretary extraordinaire that just got promoted to Vice President of the Mineshouno Products Company ; and not too long ago too…Of course I provide Mr. Niwasaki with the most elaborate designs and luminous designs for cars, yachts. Anything…even clothes.

But now…I think I'll start applying for a job at the nearest ramen stand. AND YOU KNOW WHAT? MR. WHATEVER--THE--HELL'S--BITING--MY--ASS--I'M--GONNA--BITCH--IT--OUT--AT--THE--DAMN--PERSON--KNOWN--AS--THE--VICE--PRES. CAN JUST SHOVE IT!

**RING, RING!**

Well, that's a surprise…my cell's ringing. I picked it up, and saw the number of who was calling.

"Well…what do you know? Old man Niwasaki finally decided to kick me to hell and back." I said, chuckling as I opened it and answered---"This is Aunt Baba's Morgue of Happiness, how may I be of service to you?", then ended I with a Cheshire cat grin. My style. Then after hearing little growls and huffing and puffing at my ear, I slowly stretched my arm out of the distance , knowing that he'd yell his heart out to me.

" **KISARAGI! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU! YOU ARE 2--I REPEAT, 2 HOURS LATE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"**, he yelled. Wow. No swearing? No threats? What's he on, anger management? It's must have taken lots of nerve to not--

"**YOU KNOW WHAT…? I'M TIRED OF THIS! YOU ARE ALWAYS LATE NOWADAYS? DID YOU FORGET THAT YOU, THE VICE PRESIDENT, CANNOT BE DRINKING ON WORKING DAYS? AND ALSO--"**

"Sir…" I cooed in my most sexiest voice. I tried my ultimate weapon…seducing. If right now, you are thinking--"Is the vice-president supposed to seduce the boss?"--no. I do this so I don't go deaf in my early twenties.

"You know, something has been going on in my life that's made me this way---" I gave a dramatic pause, "--and I feel like I should quit, ya' know? I mean, if I'm late everyday of the week, then I should be fired. Am I right?"

"Yes."

"So, on this last call you'll be getting from me, I really would appreciate it…if---**YOU WOULD FUCKING QUIT SCREAMING AT MY EAR? I CAN HEAR YOU CLEARLY, YOU KNOW! IN FACT, YOUR VILLAGE CALLED, THEY'RE MISSING THEIR IDIOT! AND YOU KNOW WHAT…! THE RAMEN STAND HAS A PEFRECT ROLE FOR ME WITH MY NAME ON IT! AND IF YOU CAN'T FATHOM THAT, GET THAT CUBAN CIGAR OUT OF YOUR MOUTH SHOVE IN YOUR EARS, CLEAN THEM GOOD, AND QUIT RUINING MY LIFE! GOOD-BYE!"**

"Wait, Kisa--" There. That's about it. I closed my phone, letting a few tears drop. Yet again, I am placed on another road with no path. Oh well. I stood , and found my keys, still sitting in my hand. I stared at them for a while. I stared, and stared, and stared, and stared. I sighed slowly, and stood. My eyes found the little remote--attached to the keys. I unlocked the car, and wore a tell-tale smile. So what if I am fired? I have enough cash in the bank to sustain me for a good 7 years. Besides…the boss is a jerk nowadays. I need a job now, but one with a good boss too.

Like the old man at the ramen stand. He was always nice to his customers and his employees. Yep. Always nice. My smile widened, and I looked in the trunk, as I reached out for a graphic novel.

Ne, it didn't matter what title or genre it was, as long as it was something to chill my mind off today and this morning, it would have to do. My hand grasped a certain novel, though…I looked at it. It read, Naruto. Oh yes, I remember. The little blonde-haired kid who was always given dirty looks just because he was cursed with the kyuubi.

My finger traced along the lines of the drawing. Oh, how I always adored Naruto! When I first got this novel, I was 11. I always pitied Naruto. Like him, I had no parents. I never did feel parental concern nor love. Thus how I resulted now was what I got from my childhood. All I ever had was a weird guy from who knows where. His name---Pedro! Pedro…something. Jeez…lousy memory I got, huh? Anyways, Pedro was something of a caretaker, really. Always smiling, always happy, and caring. Black, moppy hair adorned his head, his brown expressive eyes that focused on every step I took, and his humorous ways of teaching life.

Like the time I asked him why he smelt so funny. All he every told was that----BURP! And then I fell dead. Ha…humorous. Or when we walked to the grocery store, there were these ugly-ass blondes/brow/pink hair striped freaks, he yelled out, "**P.R.E.P.S.! **Pathetic, Repulsive, Enslaving, Sluts of Prostitution!" , the ugly preps looked at him and chased us off. I learned something from that, though. Preps are bad at everything, but they can run a 100 mile marathon in high heels. Yeah. That was funny. Pedro was like Iruka from Naruto. He always taught me good, if not, funny things. But the guy wasn't dead-last, either. He had 1 doctorate degree from America.

Thus, not everything had to be funny, he taught me the best he knew. And at every lesson I got wrong or right, he'd say, either I would grow up to be more successful than him, or, I'd be his boss. I never knew what he meant…but I still loved the guy. Though how I got lessons of being a women were different. He was precise…like when he took me to his friend's house, (female…people…female!) and I got my period. Smart guy…how'd he know the stupid thing came…? That there--was like Jesus Christ. Not like, but somewhat. Pedro...thy shall rest with all the hot chicks you ever wanted in heaven…

Unshed tears swelled in my eyes as I walked down the now wet path. The day he died, was when I lost all happiness…and the little family I never had. It was all lost to a gunshot…and I couldn't prevent it. Hell, am I useless or what? All of I thought from the past, I knew were only good things that made me how I am today. A sliver of a smile graced my lips as I flipped the graphic novel's pages in my hand. In a matter of half an hour of less, I was at the ramen bar, and finished reading Naruto.

I put my elbows onto the table and ordered a shrimp ramen to go, and closed my eyes. It has been such a long time since I've ever gotten a bite of ramen…all this time, its been soy this, soy that, low-fat this, sugar-free that, and all this diet crap. Until now…hey, we got to at least sin once in the religion of dietary facts, right? Soon enough, the kind old man gave me the noodles, and offered me a smile.

"Not a good day, is it?" the old man said in a kind tone.

"Nope…just fired myself…" I recalled, and took some of the money I had out of the wallet. "Keep the change, okay? Oh…um--"

"You need a job, am I correct?"

"Ahh---yes! I do! Can you give me one?" I said, hoping that this guy didn't already have someone hired.

"Hmm…of course. Though, I feel that somehow…your presence will no longer reside in our present state of dimension though… You will face something much better than this. I am sure of it, young lady." the old man piped out, and furrowed his bushy eyebrows. I lifted an eyebrow in confusion. Tomorrow I was going to die or something? How…? I mean…talk about weird.

"O-okay…well--Uhh…"

"Wait! Please heed me, don't go any further in to the forest! Don't go in the forest!"

Forest? Since when was there a forest…? Why couldn't I go past there, anyways? I usually go through this path. I turned around, not heeding his words. The package still in my hands, I wandered off in the direction of my condominium. I noticed, as I walked, it seemed to get rather foggy. So foggy, that I couldn't see within 6 inches in front of me. Another thing was that it was oddly cold. How could it get cold in the middle of June?

Especially speaking of 20 degrees Fahrenheit…much too cold, and impossible too. My steps soon wavered off into small, cautious ones. Maybe…I should have listened to the old man. Alas, it was too late, for as soon as I knew it…I was lost. Lost in the gray, forlorn clouds of the fog, I stopped. Yeah…this is where I declare myself--somewhere else. The slow, cautious steps resonated deeply into the gray scenery, and my body tensed. There was someone else here...I think.

"Well...isn't this a nice way to die…?" I calmly stated. As much I wanted to say no and stay still for my attacker to strike, my pride egged me on to strike first. Damn my ego. As far as I knew, I had no weapons. I had not my lucky **Metal Chocobo**…or my katana. Nothing. Not one single…thing. Well, all I could hope to depend on was my imagination and timing. Let's see…in my hair, I had…**metal **chopsticks.

They could work as senbon…and the high heels I wore…I got to yank them--no…aahhhh….to hell with this. I'll die happy, either way. With a full stomach, none the less. With a heavy sigh, I sat and began to eat. Some life I had…

"MMM…..noodles…"

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**(Present time)**

Thus…here I am.

In a forest.

Eating noodles.

After the dramatic moment, I continued my consuming. Tasting the salty strings of egg noodles from my bowl…mmm! I felt as if I tasted this for the first time---I mean, hey, 10 years on a diet can make you feel like all fast food were new! Come to think about…I kept thinking about all this while I sat and ate the large bowl of noodles. How come there was fog? The nearest water source was about 2 miles away from here…and it's a river. And it couldn't possibly have created a fog so thick that it could reach this forest. That's impossible…is it not? No to mention…there's not a person I know or have heard of that lives around--much less _live_ in this forest.

I had a strange feeling that I was not--dare I quote that American actress from that weird movie…-in Tokyo anymore.

Nor was I in my world…yet…I heard voices. Women…men…children… My gaze tore themselves from the ground and into now…**sunny** sky? Wait a second…when did it get so sunny? Why was a hearing a crowd? Strange…I was in the forest of my Tokyo…in which…the weather should slowly turn from moist to a tinge of sunlight, mind me…and now…it was cheerfully sunny. As for the voices that I keep hearing…my ears happened to catch some oddly familiar dialogue….

"Great job, son. Your old man is proud!"

"So now we're all adults!"

"Congratulations graduate! Tonight, mom's gonna cook up a feast!"

Eyebrows raised in familiarity, I noticed that what I heard…was…what a father said to his son after the graduation in Naruto! Then…I really wasn't in Tokyo. I, Riikano Kisaragi, am standing on Konohagakure turf--sweet. A tiny wondering idea came in my head…if I am here…could my money have changed? In a swift move, I got my wallet out--only to get 660,000 ryou sitting in there!

"Yatta…!"

I raised a fist and jumped. Now, I didn't have to go hungry, or worry about food, or a home--home. Home. Apartment…oh shit. All hope of mine were crushed when I found out that--if I bought a home or apartment…I would need an I.D. or passbook… Great. Just great. My dream has been realized weirdly…and now, I have to worry about this. Oh joy…oh fucking joy. I sighed and looked in front of me as I walked. The ninja academy was there, and so was a crowd, and…the Hokage! Crap, I had forgotten about Sarutobi! If he caught me standing here, I'm dead! The last thing I need to worry about now is him and the other ninjas!

My crimson eyes stared at what I saw next…a tree. Wait, no, no, no! Not the stupid tree! Him…Naruto! It was him! Alive and--grieving? Was he upset…? I looked hard at his figure, sitting in slight despair, thought he was truly hurting on the inside. I mentally grasped his image only to see him wince one or three times.

"Hey, isn't that the kid who--"

"Yeah. That's him. The only one who failed!"

Before I knew it, my hand flew up to my mouth and slowly cried at those despiteful words. I was then reminded of…how something familiar like that occurred to me. Only, I was 3 and it was a kindergarten graduation. My parents were still nowhere to be found, and I was baby-sat by the most pitiful woman who graced along my path. A real horror whenever I came home…she'd stare at me and look back at the T.V. And as a child, lifewasreally never easy…until Pedro came. But that was much, much later on.

All I remembered from the distant memory, was that every kid was laughing…smiling, and walking with their families. Mother, father, brother and or sister. Grandparents…uncles and aunts. They all rejoiced in the ceremony…and I too also heard such words that Naruto did…

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****20 years back….Kitonoiki Preschool---**

"_Yay! Hey, sweetums, aren't you glad you're now a big kid?"_

_**One drop.**_

"_We are so proud of you…what would you like as a gift?"_

_**Two drop.**_

"_Mommy! Daddy, can we have sweet dumplings for dinner!"_

_**Three…four…five…let the little drops fall unto the embracing arms of parent flowers…**_

"_Grandma, you came! Yay!"_

_ A young Riikano stood there when she was announced. All eyes of adults landed on her as the principal handed her a certificate, then looked away unto the gleaming eyes of their young. The raven haired girl walked down the stairs, only to be greeted by no one. Loneliness and pain hit her very hard, as children whispered stupid rumors about her parents running off on her. Crystal tears ran down her beautiful porcelain face…and her hair cascaded down with her. _

"_Look…it's that Kisaragi girl! I heard her parents never came for her."_

"_Such a shame. Oh well, maybe she's bad mannered."_

"_Mommy, mommy! It's that girl, the one I told who hit me!"_

"_Really? Geez, no wonder her parents forgot."_

"_Did you know that the girl never made a friend? I heard she's gothic or something…"_

_ Quiet steps were all that was left behind…and went into the rain. Riikano found her favorite swing and sat on it. Knowing her parents never would do something like push her, she raised her stubby legs and pushed herself, only to slide off, and get a split, blood wound. Despite her efforts in trying to keep the rain off her, Riikano made a tough decision and ripped off a piece of her dress and wrapped it around the wound. And in little time, she walked to the nearest video store to purchase a funny volume of Excel Saga._

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_**Present time**_

Tears moistened my hands as I sniffed, feeling hurt and broken. How I always hated things like that! Holidays in which families always participated made me sick. I knew Naruto would feel like that. Until---click! The light in my head brought up something! I still had the ramen bowl! Naruto loves ramen! Being the Samaritan I thought I always was, I whispered loud enough for the blonde to hear.

"Naruto…Naruto…"

In response, the boy lifted his head in surprise and looked behind him. He looked for what called him, and what he found was me. Smiling in response, I said…"Want my ramen? I really never ate it all, and I wondered…"

"For me…? Oi-----how do you know my name!" he pointed at me. I really hoped he didn't take me as an enemy…

"Listen…wait, here!" I gave him the lukewarm bowl, and sat down. I sat and listened to his noisy slurps and noises of appreciation. All of what I knew of this boy remained the way I knew it. Blonde, spiky hair, curious, blue eyes, and sun-kissed skin of a light tan hue…and that scary appetite he had. A large sweat drop ran down my forehead head as he finished eating and looked at me.

"Arigatou, pretty lady! I appreciate the ramen! You got any more!" he smiled. Gee…one bowl of ramen can get his hopes up? This kid had one hell of a one-tracked mind. Nodding my head in response, I held my hand out for him to shake.

"I believe I didn't introduce myself--"

"Name's Uzumaki Naruto! I'm Konoha's number one best shinobi and prankster! My dream I to one day become the Hokage! Believe it!"

I smiled. He sweat-dropped. So…this really was Naruto. No pranks…no actors…nothing. Awesome. At least, the boss can't send any police men to capture me…but what about my things! Great…I am sent to Konoha, and I don't have my things! Clothes, I can make and get, food, that too…but all my irreplaceable anime and manga! My designs! What am I going to do…and…I need a job! A job! Oh God, why me! At this moment Naruto was probably staring at me, thinking I was more nuts that I looked…

"Ok, pretty lady! What's your name? Why are you wearing that? Why are you here? And can I get some raaaamen?" the blonde boy clapped his hands in begging. Wow. All four questions stated in four seconds…and still this kid wants ramen…

I stood, Naruto now wide-eyed and staring at me. Of course, he had to. He only reached up to my abdomen, pretty short for a 12 year old, I might say. I looked down at him, and told him my name. Sir Bubbly responded with a "That's really pretty!", and I thanked him. Personally because no ever told me that, and then I looked at him. And after I told him about what happened to me…he smiled real wide.

"And how many bowls of ramen are we talking about?"

Sigh. This will rip off all my money I just recently found in my wallet.

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"Iruka…do you know the young lady Naruto is speaking to?" an old voice spoke.

It was none other than the grand Hokage, one of the five ninja powers, one out of five leaders who ruled thousands of ninja. Sarutobi, the Hokage recently came out to watch the graduation and many people who came to pick up their children, congratulating them for their success in the ninja academy and how they were going to love being a genin.

The old man, filled with knowledge and power, was still recovering from a new headache that came from one of Naruto's many pranks. The boy had such nerve, he thought. So much nerve to have faced the consequences and putting himself in trouble--yet again--and paint the monument of the four previous Hokages, including himself. Every day, he had to suffer with a complaint hat Naruto had just done something that always got him in trouble.

Could Sarutobi blame the poor child? In terms of mischievous behavior, of course…but it wasn't entirely his fault. All the stupidity of going into dilemmas…was only out of needing attention. He watched the boy grow, year after year, time after time, and he always saw the same thing. No difference, for Naruto. But for the people…he only felt a tiny tinge that pained him. Hatred in his people's eyes. Hatred against Naruto. Never was the boy treated with equality, just as the fourth Hokage asked for. The worse, besides not having parents, was that people hated him for what he was.

The Kyuubii's prison. Only because he was the imprisonment of the Kyuubi no Gaki. And only for that reason.

All of the villagers saw him as a monster and not the little boy that he was. The true Naruto, the prankster, the pained orphan. It was always a mystery never seeing Naruto cry or breaking down. It was always a tad annoying to hear him say…"ONE DAY, I WILL SURPASS YOU, OLD MAN! I WILL ADVANCE MY WAY ONTO BEING THE NEXT HOKAGE! BEEELIEVE IT!" And so, that little blonde, whiskered ball of spunk kept him content. As well for how Naruto kept one of his chunin on his toes.

"Afraid not. In fact, I don't even know her. Is she from some where else?" the younger, baritone voice piped up.

(A.N.: THIS IS THE 8TH PAGE! WTF? N: Wow…)

The voice that responded was from no else than Iruka Umino. One of Sarutobi's chunin and best teachers of the ninja academy, Iruka was orphaned at the age of 12. He knew all about the time of when the Kyuubi ravaged destruction upon Konoha. The pain of how he lost his parents, how horrendous it was to see the vulpine demon sweep away hordes of ninja that leaped onto him to insure the safety of Konoha…and mostly important…the young child of whom was selected to be the imprisonment for the fox.

The cries that came from Naruto, and the painful roaring from the Kyuubi as he was locked away were still engraved deeply.

However…he had no hatred for the boy. Rather, he had respect for him. The only hatred he had for was the ridiculous behavior Naruto gained from years of internal suffering. Iruka had also experienced things like this. It was no different, except that he was orphaned at 12, while Naruto, spent his whole life, from birth, delving in the pits of despising pain that the villagers provided. Sure, Naruto was ill-mannered and oblivious to the fact that Iruka had to swallow more aspirins than he did ramen, but the boy was still like a friend. Or probably like a younger brother. Either of which, would be fine.

Of course, he could have almost suffered severe brain damage from the eruption of blood from the nosebleed he had. The one from yesterday to be precise, right after Naruto's…"show". And right now, he watched the crowd, which remained for a while. Though, Iruka couldn't help but see Naruto sitting on the swing with such a pained face. That face…the same face that reminded Iruka of his younger pre-teen years.

The face he truly had after the harsh scolding that the sensei provided him with. As of now, he and Sarutobi recently noticed the strange girl that spoke to Naruto. She was giving him…ramen? A telltale question mark hung over his head as he and Sarutobi watched the little scene.

It looked like they were introducing each other, and no other thing. What really wound his mind was…how the girl was dressed. Never had he seen such--formal, yet strange clothes in his life. A business dark crimson jacket, a white blouse, high-heel shoes…and the skirt…

SPLURT!…drip, drip, drip.

"Iruka…I would really appreciate it if I could have a word with you. If you don't mind as well…please refrain your nosebleed, please. I don't favor taking my headdress to the cleaners again…" Sarutobi alleged, a drop of blood ran down the white of the headdress .

"AGGH! GOMEN NASAI, HOKAGE-SAMA! And, yes, I--I don't mind. " Iruka pleaded. Poor guy. Iruka not only needed to talk with the Hokage…but he looked at the girls lingerie and bled all over the Hokage's headdress... Holding his nose in such pity, Iruka glanced yet again at the girl. She was…very astonishing in looks. A crimson tinged his cheeks as he stared at her…

Looks like he won't stop drooling in the next couple of hours….

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Menchi: Wow…this was a nine pager! Yeah! I was going for 12, but my fingers hurt, my brain hurts…and I gotta study for a test! Oh, and here are some things I decided to post too!

**Metal Chocobo**: I remember playing Kingdom Hearts, and when I won this sword…I loved the name! And cause it was from FF…? I forgot….

**Uncle Pedro:** I wanted to include the guy, cause I love him!

About the character's name….I got it from a manga…I think…I wasn't being very creative, now was I…?Yeah….anyways, this is my first Naruto fanfic…I was bored…and I am starting to write the next one! Yay!

ARIGATOU FOR READING THIS!


	2. Blobs and Honesty Live In The Fridge!

M.R.: Hello, potatoes and cheesewheels! (LOL) I fancy that you all read chapter one, right? Good, good. On the 28 of February, it was a very good day for me! My aunt, who was artificially fertilized, gave birth to my cousin! I was told that he was very cute, because he was born with auburn hair and hazel eyes. Lucky kid. Wish my hair was like that…hhmmmm. Anyways, because my cousin was born, I stayed home to baby-sit my little brother. THAT MEANT NO SCHOOL! WOOT, WOOT! Yeah…I'm very very very very very very very very very very very very very lazy.

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**I DO NO OWN NARUTO. IF I DID, KAKASHI AND IRUKA WOULD BE IN MY ROOM, LOCKED UP…HEH, HEH, HEH…I am sooo sick….**

**K**akashi:…..reads Icha Icha Paradise… Ha, ha, ha….

Iruka:…Is she going to kill me…?…..

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**Grip Onto Reality, or Else No Ramen!**

_**Lesson for the Day! Chapter 2:Blobs Live In The Fridge, and So Does Your Honesty! At Least, That's What I've Heard…**_

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Iruka, who followed the Hokage, replayed images of the girl's face. Meanwhile...his face still had a tinge of red on it. But by all means, he didn't lose so much blood now. It was only a tiny glimpse of her lingerie, really. Who knew that only a slight glimpse would make his nose run so badly? And yet…he felt very…shy when he saw her. She was very pretty, with nightshade hair and dark crimson eyes that pierced one's one soul… This was only the way he saw her, of course. It wasn't like anyone else noticed her, right? Except the Hokage…who seemed to be fond of why she was here. His leg made a sharp turn and went in the office of the Hokage to speak with him. Though he couldn't help but feel a bit worried about Naruto.

Surely, Naruto would be ok…at least with the young woman whom he was talking to didn't seem dangerous…

"_Note to self: Ask Naruto who she is by bribing him 5 bowls of ramen tomorrow!"_ thought our little friend as he slinked in the Hokage's office.

**(With Riikano and Ramen-boy! LOL!) **

After the long and promised tour Naruto gave, I was now sure that I knew all of Konoha! During the tour, I managed to buy myself some clothes. What I bought really didn't cost so much as it did back home, and I even got to buy an uber cool sleeping cap! It looks a lot like a demented rabbit, at least that's what Naruto had told me, but I thought it was cute and made it look like was sucking your brains out! Ah, ha, ha, ha….I love this hat… Now onto other things.

Not only did Naruto get stared at, but it seems that my appearance took off some of glares and rumoring whispers the villagers that he usually got. Finally…I was of some use! No longer did I feel like a bother…

"Hey Naruto…are you get--"

"Naruto, I need to speak with you for a second." another voice interrupted me. I looked to see who had spoken and lo' and behold…there was Mizuki; in what some of my younger days was once the heartthrob of a girl in 6th grade. Yep, silver hair that reached the nape of his neck, grayish eyes, and a calm demeanor. But I know better of this guy. I knew that at the time that this so-called 'trusted' ninja came along to see Naruto…it would become a test. Anyways, judging by the tiny hint of slyness in his voice I decided to ask Naruto if I could go to his apartment and at least stay there until I found a proper job and home as well.

Surprisingly, the kid agreed and lent me his key and notes as to where he lived. Lovable twerp…I can't see why people loathe him.

And with that, Naruto left off with Mizuki, while I headed to the apartment. Thus I now officially begin the little adventure I claim think is…I think. I trotted down the streets that Naruto had written down on the piece of paper, turning this way and that-a-way. Eventually, I got there. Well, not before grocery buying so I could cook something up for Naruto in gratitude for letting me stay in his house. Really good kid, that Naruto. Never have I seen such a nice guy, much less a boy his age, act so courteous towards me. Sure, Naruto would sometimes yell or be a little obnoxious, but that's his manner of saying, "Hey, you may be angry at me because I'm the Kyuubii's prison, but **I'm** still a kid! Believe it!" Etc, etc, etc…

**What a swell way to go…**

My head turned to the direction of the apartment, only to find it that it lied on the 5th floor. Glee. Pure, bloody, fucking glee. Now I have to do a major workout…and on top of that make Naruto's dinner…and then his clothes…and mine…and I have to prepare my room. A hell of work, but it was, like I said what I owe Naruto. Trekking my way up the stairs, I happened to notice a flash running by me, and going into Naruto's….APARTMENT! WHAT THE HELL? NOW THERE'S SOMEONE ROBBING HIM! JUST HOW CRUEL WERE THESE VILLAGERS? No matter, but that there's stealing, and by what I know by my own code of honor. Making a beeline to the stranger, I lifted my bag and clouted the crap out of this guy. Only…I found out that this was…another character I knew.

"OW…"

"AAAAHHH! OH, GOD! FORGIVE ME! I thought you were a thug or something--" my mindless babbling stopped as I saw none other than the chunin Naruto knew as a brother figure. Iruka Umino. Oh, guess what…NOW THAT THIS GUY SAW ME, I'LL GET REPORTED TO THE HOKAGE! Way to go, Riika. Way to go. My legs strode over to him, and I helped him up. His eyes, which were squinted, mind you, opened, only to stare at me. If it always a moment I hated with all my guts, it's definitely the stare. Staring is rude and annoying. We all know, and I hate it. Waning to break the silence and staring, I lifted my other hand, hoping that he at least knew how to shake it.

(LOL! THIS SOOOO SOUNDS WRONG! MUAHAHAHAHA! gets bitch-slapped Owie….meanies.)

Iruka did as I thought he would until the very words I feared came out.

"Excuse me, miss. What are you doing here?"

Well…these weren't the ones I had hoped…but anyways! I answered his question, hoping that he would just leave it at that. As I did, I noticed that it was approximately the time he had to go fetch Naruto…and we couldn't let the obnoxious turd of a star get killed by a hot silver bullet, now can we? Hell no. He continued talking until I said…

"Were you doing something?"

"AGH! NARUTO! ARIGATOU, MISS!"

"Nooo problem, sir." I spat. Gee some people, even the normal ones, have a one-tracked mind. I wonder on which track this guy's on…scratch that, I don't wanna know. Striding into the apartment as I did 12 minutes, ago, I noticed the look of the apartment. Ramen cups here and there, unwound scrolls of unknown length, and…a carton of…old milk? Nice. In the manga, Naruto's room wasn't so messy, but in real life…it was a pigsty. To put it bluntly, it was a dump of shit. Not very enormous…but enough to make squirm or twitch and eyebrow.

Automatically, I picked up some of the trash as I proceeded my way onto the kitchen. Same thing, but not very extreme either. A lot more ramen boxes were randomly left on various places. Man, is this what the kid ate? Noodles, noodle, noodles, and--oh, look! More noodles. My pale fingers wrapped themselves around the refrigerator handle and yanked it open. Scanning for any lost, living things in the refrigerator, I noticed a tiny blob with…**eyes!**

Was the sight of Naruto's apartment that bad or was it me?

Suddenly, it slowly opened its mouth. Mouth. Eyes. On a blob. That's nice to have; I guess I'll call him 'Bobfred'. The blob thing stared at me and hissed. He snapped a couple of times, pissing me off whenever he got the chance. He then tried jumping me, only to get a mouthful of disinfectant and a rag. Then, he slowly disintegrated. Cool. Never knew that blobs actually came to life; especially the ones that **_live _**in your fridge. I always thought dust bunnies did this, but it was a slimy blob that proved me wrong. The time I had, was now spent on cleaning. I placed things where they went, left some other things behind, the usual.

Thus, I have found a new hobby. Cleaning gives you plenty of discoveries! Besides loose change…, mind you, he had 159,295 ryou lying around here! Some loose shuriken (not nice to sit on one, either), loose kunais, and even…his hat! The little sleeping cap…that "devoured" heads. The cleansing ceremony proceeded unto Naruto's room. I managed to keep my hands to myself, and washed some of the scattered clothes articles. All this took an hour or two, but it was worth it. Everything said, "Hey, the Goddess cleaned! Are we saved? THANK YOU MISTRESS OF THE SANITARY! WE LOVE THIS! I FEEL 13 YEARS YOUNGER NOWADAYS!"

Now, Naruto had nothing to worry about! I even found a pot cooker, and it was mint condition. Never been used, let alone touched. I glanced up at the clock, only to see it say 4:45 a.m. That is strange…Naruto should have been here by now. He should have survived the fight by now…and he's probably done eating ramen and got his hitai-ate…right? Well…since I finished with the chores and other things…I might as well take a good bath. Yes…a bath would be nice indeed! Besides…there's nothing wrong with a good soak, now is there? Warm water, soap…and I could put the extremely cute, head-devouring hat!

And with that I headed to the bathroom. Only to shower, get a blanket, and head straight to…uh…the couch. Yes, the couch! Stealing a bed is not nice towards Naruto!

**(With our dear chunin and newly announced genin!)**

The two friends walked along the dry, barren streets f Konoha, their bellies filled with noodles, beef, and miso broth. Naruto and Iruka just finished their congratulatory ramen dinner after the fight…and after all the bandaging as well. All was cam and well when they returned the scroll, Naruto was forgiven by the Hokage, and Mizuki was sentenced to prison because of abusing a child's trust and stealing.

(OMFG…THAT WENT AND SOUNDED WRONG…OH WELL! Naruto: EW…that sounds really-- Menchi: Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up and die!)

Though all of that was taken care of, our blonde, whiskered friend had forgotten about his newly found friend who left to the apartment. It was already 5:03 a.m., and he didn't even return! Riikano must have been worried sick all night long…especially the mess he had left in the apartment… She probably left or something, because of the stupid chaotic mess… Naruto fidgeted with his fingers and a tiny bead of sweat rolled down. Maybe this was the time to tell Iruka-sensei about the girl that came from nowhere and introduce her to him? Or maybe he should keep this a secret?

After all, Riika-chan, as he dubbed her, was his first female friend. She didn't yell at him or sneer at him; instead she listened to him and smiled at him when needed. She was almost like a sister, really. A really _hot, 20 year-old _sister. Almost some of the guys of shinobi that sometime may or may not notice him asked Naruto who she was or to damn him to hell for having a hot date. The last thing Naruto thought about sounded wrong, though.

How can someone so kind and cute, who's 10 years older than him, possibly date him? Sure, he could accept her if she was 13, but to him, Riika-chan was like his onii-chan. Someone who looked after him, like his sensei, Iruka. Someone who was quickly like family to him. She really took a liking to him too. Riika liked walking with him, and laughed at his jokes, and whenever they had the chance, wrestled. Even if they had just met and even if it was only for a day or two.

Though, the best thing besides the cute personality, was how the young lady classified her ramen. Naruto was jealous of that, though. No way was there another person who knew their ramen better than himself. Then caught into a little spat…he yelled that he knew his ramen and she practically named more than 1 thousand types and flavors of ramen. Funny thing, really.

"Hey, Iruka-sensei?" the blonde spoke. His sensei sent a smile towards him.

"Yes, Naruto?"

"There's someone want to introduce you to! Her name's Riikano Kisaragi! She's very pretty and she even invited me to ramen! I was wondering…is it alright for you to meet her? I know we just fought Mizuki-teme, and you're wounded, can we? Pleeeeease?" said the genin, who folded his hands and bowed his head.

'_Damn Naruto for this cuteness…but…meeting that girl…' _though Iruka sensei as he pictured her, saying hello to him and serving Naruto and him some breakfast… A tiny trail of blood, once again dripped from his nose.

"Hey---IRUKA ARE YOU HAVING A HORNY MOMENT? DOES IT INCLUDE RIIKANO! YOU PERVERT, SHE'S LIKE AN ONII-CHAN TO ME! HELLO? WAKE UP, NOSE-BLEED!"

'Wha--NARUTO, YOU MORON! I AM NOT FANTASIAING, OR HAVING A PLEASURABLE IMAGE OF RII---Kano…" the chunin brunette quieted down, not only because of his screaming, but also of what he said.

"Now, Naruto…what you just heard…it--it--isn't what you think!"

"Oohhh------you think of Riikano as your---you knoooooow!" the sly, mischievous brat held a pinky in the air, and held a wry smile to complete the little interjection. Iruka, who obviously knew that this brat wouldn't shut up about this, a tiny crush, smashed his head.

"NARUUTOOOO! WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST SAY!"

"Itai, itai, itai----I was only kidding…!" yelped Naruto, who sat cross-legged on the floor, was tending to a new lump.

"You lummox…" Umino hissed. This way Iruka acted…was very...odd. Only Naruto knew one emotion that his sensei was experiencing right now…but what was it? His blue eyes, glanced at Iruka, noting the facial expressions that remained on his face. Red tinted the scar above Iruka's nose, a fine trail of sweat trailed down his left temple, and oh, ho-ho…! Whatever sensei was thinking, it must have been a pretty good thought! Naruto's idiot ness and strange thoughts of Iruka were disturbed when his head came in contact with the stairs leading to his apartment.

"Naruto! Are you alright!" came the worried voice.

"Ugh….h-hai…mmm….I want rameeeeen!"

"That shows me that you are fine…but that bump looks pretty big…"

And here ends the strange morning our 2 protagonists spent!

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**(Defender of the Supermart 3! Just kidding! On with our heroine, meep!)**

Distant chirps of various birds rang in my head, thus waking me up. I cracked one eye, only to be blinded by the damn sun rays. Evil, ultra-violet rays…damn you to hell. My hand reached out to smash a clock…but I only felt air. That's nice…someone must have gotten the clock---WHOA! WAIT A FU MINUTE! WHERE'S MY CLOCK? Wasn't I just sleeping in my room? Dreaming about a chicken screaming "Badger, badger, badger, badger, badger…MUSHROOM, MUSHROOM!"? Apparently, I had forgotten that I was sleeping in Naruto's apartment. Speaking of which...Naruto should have been here. So…he must be here!

Flailing in a tangle of messes, I ran to the room of my fine, ramen addict friend, only to find no one. Frightened as hell, I ran to the kitchen…and 'lo and behold…I find Naruto and Iruka…sipping tea. I stood at the doorway staring at them…and they did the same.

"Naruto! There you are! Goddammit, I was very worried!"

"Uh…sorry for worrying you, Riika…and thank you for cleaning my apartment! I hope it wasn't too messy…" Naruto pouted. I couldn't help but smile back. Damn Naruto for the loveable cuteness he held! Can't resist him, though! I looked at Iruka, and bowed.

"I believe we've met before, and I hope you forgive me crashing into you, and smashing you to the floor…the name's Riikano Kisaragi." my eyes held their gaze the slightly red chunin. I noticed that in the daylight…he didn't look too bad. He wasn't amazingly dashing, but easy on the eyes. His appearance was a little similar to mine, only to show that he was 2 years older than me. I noticed that Naruto wore the headband that belonged to Iruka, and smiled.

"My name is Iruka Umino, and I am Naruto's sensei from the ninja academy. You have quite a strong blow when it comes to knocking people down…" the brown-haired chunin smiled at me. I did in response, and failed to notice that my attire wasn't exactly proper.

"That cap looks like its eating your head, Riika-chan! Hee…"

"Yes…speaking of eating, do you two want anything for breakfast?" my grin, which overtook my face. "And as for you, Iruka-san…I have I feeling that you haven't seen me around in the village. Am I right?"

"Sadly yes…an--"

"You must inform Lord Hokage about my sudden appearance in Konohagakure…right?" I added, and heat the stove for the pot of water. Iruka then stared at me, as if I grew another head. I reached out to my right, opening the rice cooker, and began serving rice, along with the rice balls I had recently made. Blinking in surprise, I ran into the bathroom, coming out in no more than 6 seconds with a regular outfit. The two guys blinked and stared some more! Whee…as if they never saw someone dress up fast, then come back, and not look messy! Ha, ha, ha…

"Wow…that was…quick!"

"Uh…thanks…anyways…want some eggs?" I asked, hoping that the boy would forget about females' time in getting dressed. Hence he giggled and looked at Iruka, who then, glared at him. Shrugging in confusion, I began cooking the eggs, and as soon as I knew it, I felt a gaze right on my ass. I could've sworn it might have been Naruto...but I turned around only to find Iruka staring at my ass.

**THAT'S IT…THIS GUY'S OUTTA CHARACTER! IS MY ASS REALLY THAT FASCINATING!**

"Any reason why my butt's a rather nice thing to look at?"

"Ahh…AAHHH! I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO!" the poor chunin raised his hands in mercy, hoping that I wasn't going to clout him once again. **(Note that I love the word "clout". Meaning to hit or strike. BTTS-back to the story!)** Iruka indeed knew the correct answer...I wanted to clout the living hell outta here...but I'll give the guy a chance. Merciful of me…not what you usually saw from me.

**

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**

**(ON with our blushing chunin!)**

I looked at Naruto as we both made our way up the stairs. Grunting in pain, I thought about giving the kid a diet...how can a short brat like Naruto weigh this much! He eats about 60 cups of ramen every day, does exercise, and he weighs this much! Gee…ramen has many possibilities. A hand tugged at my shoulder, indicating that Naruto finally awoke.

He leaped off my back, and took his key out. As he twisted the doorknob, we both awaited for the mess and usually pale color of the apartment. We were greeted by the smell of…aloe? Naruto looked around in his apartment, slipped his shoes off, and in which I did the same, and stepped inside.

"W-wow…its so bright!" I gasped. Never have I seen Naruto's place so…sanitary… Was it Riikano that cleaned the place? Naruto could've cleaned it, but not like a professional would. It practically gleamed. We walked in the living room, and voila…no ramen cups or loose socks. His training "area" was neatly packed, and the kitchen proudly shone. In fact, the stain where Naruto accidentally burnt his ramen was gone. At the right of his kitchen table sat a rice cooker. Naruto had a rice cooker?

I never knew that…Naruto wasn't the rice addict, so why would he keep one? It looked like an old model from 2 years ago and seemed to be in good condition.

"Ehh…since when did I own a rice cooker?"

"Maybe it was buried in the trash you…" I followed in response. Nearly forgetting about Riika, Naruto ran to the living room, signalizing me to come. I walked carefully, trying not to wake her up. Then, it was at that moment I saw her. Riikano... She had what I wanted out of a girl…silky hair that rivaled the night's velvety darkness, sun-kissed skin, and those cute, small, and well-rounded lips…AGH! WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING! Now **_I'm _**the pervert. Tiny snickers of laughter came from Naruto, and somehow, my elbow managed to shut him up.

The last thing I want now is for her to wake up, scream and slap me. And maybe hate me for the rest of my life.

"Come on, let's wait for her to wake up. We also need our rest and we need to bandage each other up." I told Naruto. H nodded and ran to get the supplies. As I waited, my head turned and looked at the sleeping figure. Somehow…I couldn't help but smile whenever I see her. Though, I shouldn't forget…Hokage-sama wanted me to take her to him, and that was something I felt like not doing. It's very odd how the average human being tends to react to more emotional command instead of irrational ones, right?

"Seeensei! I found them, now let's go into the kitchen! I don't wanna wake Riika-chan up." the hyperactive blonde beamed. I followed suit and went in. This was going to turn out just fine.

**

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(The Hokage! Wheee! Hokage:…snuff pipe Why must the young antagonize me?)**

Wrinkled hands slowly hovered across the crystal ball, showing the nine-tail imprisonment and chunin. He too saw the young woman, and pondered of her arrival. He had seen it in a vision, the girl walking straight into the forest, then appearing ---all was cut of because of the graduation for the cadets at the ninja academy. The search for Riika, as he learnt her name from Naruto and Iruka, was easy. He didn't need to send out ninjas to search for a girl from nowhere; he only needed Iruka to bring her in after the Jounin and genin teamed up. At least this small detail of work was made easy and not headstrong.

The Hokage observed with adept eyes and listened with open ears, and gathered pieces of this strange dilemma. He often laughed or chuckled whenever the trio did something or at least made a mistake. Noticing what they began to talk about, the Hokage pondered.

'_I wonder…does this girl know of our world? And if so, what will be the outcome if she decides to tell the worst…? Only time will tell. But--she wouldn't say anything…would she?'_

Groaning in annoyance, our wrinkled friend, dubbed by the village as the 'Professor', set off to work. Only as he entered the office…he found a load of papers…again…

(Hokage: 'Wrinkled friend?' Would you rather feeling the anger of Emma? --+ M: N-nn-nno….)

"Riikano-san?" asked the chunin.

My turned my attention towards him, noting that he sent a rather serious look at me. The feeling of mental strain was crushing me as I knew that I had to go see the Hokage.

"Do you know of our leader? The Hokage?"

I nodded my head sideways; its only a white lie…not like he and Sarutobi-sama would should a lecture up my ass.

Would they?

"Uhh---Naruto did you ever tell me about wanting to be a Hokage?" I asked sincerely. With a speedy nod, Naruto widened his eyes and looked at Iruka. Obviously, the kid knew about the picture taking for his ninja I.D., so he bowed and left. Only Iruka and I were left standing, feeling a tiny wind of dust touch our legs. This sure was awkward.

"Uhh---do I have to go see the Hokage..?" my voice asked, leaving a tiny shudder after.

"Yes. He's seen you, and only needs to speak with you. Is it alright?"

Suddenly, the floor seemed kind of interesting to look at the moment…

"Riika...are you crying? I--don't worry! Lord Hokage won't yell at you! He's very kind, in fact. Noble and honest as he is, he might help you."

Once again, I looked at him. Couldn't this guy get a clue? I didn't want to return home. This place actually felt like home to me. After what I did, yelling at my boss, his policemen might as well shoot me. And as for one to not fear consequences…I was a coward. A hopeless, misshapen coward. I detested the cold, gray walls of the cellars, for I remembered what had happened to Pedro. I was only in my early teens when he died. And after the funeral, I was called to go see the prisons. All I saw when I got there were broken spirits, some innocent people who look at me like I was fortunate…other gave me the wrong look, but as I headed to the prison that held the filthy bastard who took away my only family…my fear for confinement grew.

He stared at me with uncaring eyes, and was alert when he saw the police there. What he told me was that...it was not only him that needed to take Pedro's life away…but it was God who decided as well. Only shedding tears, I bowed my head down and whispered to him that he was nothing but a selfish person who cared naught about others who were dear to others. Only a dirty, cold arm stretched out…and his voice chuckled…

'_A child cannot understand this type of pain…but they can understand and experience such bloody pleasure.'_

Horrible, unforgiving word…from that man…

"Riika…Riika? Are you alright…we're here…"

Huh…oh--I--thank you…wait…how the hell did we get here?" I questioned.

"I transported us to the place. Don't worry, you wouldn't walk or speak, so I did the best thing besides carrying you."

My head faced the ground again…"Forgive me…I didn't mean to---"

"No, no, no…after what you became to Naruto, I can't help but feel ashamed that I'm not doing anything."

A tiny smile adorned my face and I bowed, leaving towards the office. Form what I knew from the book, my legs and mind took me to the Hokage's place. Though couldn't, that what Iruka told me. He handed me a pass, and said that I was going to need it for entrance. There were ANBU who were guarding the place, and it was better to be safe than sorry. I happily agreed to that and left. I owed this guy a lot. If, not less. Why do I have to go see him…? I was better off getting hit by something…but what do you know? I was knocked off course by a 6 foot tall hunk of flat abs, laziness and mystery. It was none other than…Hatake Kakashi.

'_Shit, shit…I wanted to meet this guy later….damn the authoress!'_

'_HEEEY! THAT'S MEEEEAN! I SHALL MURDER YOU!'_

'_In that case...no._'

'_Now that's what to hear...FORWARD MAAAARCH!'_

As I ignored the authoress…the silver-haired Jounin reached out to help me from the floor. Surprisingly, his grip was pretty strong; no duh, this guy was from the ANBU…why wouldn't he have a strong grip? His lazy eye that held power looked at me, and I STARED AT HIM. Again…here we go again with the staring. To make the staring longer…let me introduce this famous pervert of a character!

Name: Hatake Kakashi

Age: 25

Hair: Silver-white!

Eyes: One black…the other sharingan or red.

Height: Heard he's 6.…foot…something.

Personality: Always late, is a pervert…he reads Icha Icha Paradaisu and…is serious even when joking! I think…shit I forgot….

Signature Move: Raikiri or Chidori! And specializes in 1000 other moves!

As our little fest of staring ended, I stood quickly and forgave myself, and did the same. Only...my conscious did not know the word and command…'shut up'.

"My name's Riikano Kisaragi--"

"The Hokage wishes to speak with you."

'_Shit, shit…he knows…'_

" Don't worry, only Iruka-san, the Hokage, and I know about you. There's no worry." the jounin's smirk revealed by his eyes curving upwards. This guy--did he have a psychic ability or was just me…? No matter, I needed to go see the old man, and this guy ain't stopping me! My leg moved to right , only to be stopped by Kakashi's right leg; and same goes for the left. I did the same…then I had a stupid idea. As I flitted my eyes in despair, I feel to the ground. Like I planned, the scarecrow proceeded to lift me…only to have me zip underneath him and dart off.

'Ha ha! Now, I don't need to worry! Good thing I'm a track runner…" I beamed. As air hit my face and flowed throughout my hair, I failed to notice the nicely worked out six-pack hunk that appeared in front of me.

'Off--!"

"Mou…you were saying…?"

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, crap, fuck shit….what the hell are you made of? I almost cracked my head…HEY, HEY, HEY! PUT ME DOWN! I COMMAND YOU, PUT ME DOWN!"

"Hmmm…No. My first impression on you…"

"….well?"

"You suck. A lot more than any other person. Though, you did a good escapade…but it failed…"

My hand slapped my face as he continued carrying me to the office. Despite all the threats and bribes I made (which, some he almost agreed to…), this guy wouldn't let go. Sweatdrop…make note…after this…I shall see what's under the mask…

(The reader, at this point, we have deemed, one-track minded. gets shot ITAI! YOU MAKE ME-A BLEEED!)

"No…I will not let you see what's under my mask, Riikano." the Jounin said, obviously knowing that I thought of this.

"Grr……."

"Lord Hokage, is this who you wanted to speak with?" Kakashi asked.

My eyes caught the gaze of the wise lord. His eye truly fixated on me, whether I was going to speak or not. I merely felt like he should ask the questions…it would be rude of me to ask first. Fictional character or not, it was always the lord who got the uppercut of a conversation.

"So…I see you were able to come. Please, have a seat." requested the lord.

I did as told, and dusted my skirt. (Not a whore skirt…just a ninjas one with shorts under…) Again I landed my gaze his, listening to what he would ask. He folded his hands and looked at me. Eye to eye…and not one single blink. We continued until he puffed a tiny cloud from the pipe and spoke.

"Do you know where you are…"

"Kisaragi…Riikano Kisaragi." I answered.

"Very well…we know your name, at least. As for my question…tell the truth." the Hokage spoke.

"Yes. I do know where I am. This is the village in the leaves…correct? Konohagakure?" I rose my eyebrows in hope. The Hokage nodded, and smiled a bit. Gladly knowing that he wouldn't sic any shinobi on me, I clamly answered some more questions.

"Do you know anything of our village…?"

"A lot. I don't mean to say this in a rude way…but I am not--"

"From this dimension. Correct?" he closed his eyes.

"Yes. You get it now. I don't come from this place at all. The only way I got here…was by some sort of…fog. In reality, I don't know sir. Honest. But…I do require a home and job…though, I am already living with Naruto Uzumaki. Is that alright with you? As of now, I am paying him by at least helping around with usual things."

He kindly smiled at me and nodded, finally knowing what he was going to say.

"And…you don't want me getting caught by any other enemies…right? As well...the future of you and the other villages…is still not complete. Though--I can't help…but…worry."

Raising his head in response, Sarutobi stood and looked at me again. I didn't want to say anything to him of his…future. It was painful seeing it 10 years ago…and I certainly didn't want to bring grief. Sarutobi…would die at the hands of his own student. And I had a feeling, that not even he wanted to hear it. He already knew that somewhere throughout in his time…he would eventually decease.

"Its alright if you don't want to me to hear it. Your safety, however…concerns me more than anything else."

"Am I now one of your biggest, head-throbbing problems on your list…? If so…forgive me…I can help you file and do some paperwork! Or perhaps an assistant? You do look tired…"

Chuckling in response, the Hokage nodded. Looks like I made it. Jackpot, cha-ching and booyah. Future happiness and tears here I COME!

"It also a good idea that you live with Naruto…but---"

"I-I can pay for the rent! I swear…!"

"Yes, I know…but…you need somewhere to live where not even Naruto would be harmed too."

Crestfallen, I sunk in the floor…I wanted to stay with him baaaadly…I can't stand perverse egos, worrywarts or both! But…he has a point…I don't wanna hurt Naruto, no matter how lonely, I felt. I want him to avoid possible dangers that could kill him. Sighing, I felt a hand upon my shoulder, and black eyes pinning me to the floor.

"Though…you can live next to Hatake…"

"Whaaaaa-----? O-oookay. A-Arigatou…"

"Your welcome."

"Can I dub you Tou-san…?"

Nodd, nodd.

Tiny chuckles came out form this guy, and I embraced him. I felt like he was the father I never had. And I'm sure he feels the same way too. I cried and gave thanks he let me stay. Having no intentions in staying in my dimension, I would work hard to death to stay here. And many thanks to the Hokage. Wise, kind and lending his hand to help. What a true father could also do. I now knew that I will start life…anew.

* * *

Menchi's: Yep…that's a dozy! I love how I ended this. I'm not pairing the Hokage like---well, you know. Rather than portraying him as a boring leader, I tried hard to make him sound both concerning and caring. Like a father. Or Grandfather. I can't help but think that I actually did it. Now, as for Iruka----did I portray him well? And Kakashi….? Please give me tips….or helps…

Forgive me for the late chapter too. I was trapped by testing and the loss of my beloved fish…Critter. I felt depressed…laugh all you want…but he's very special to me.

All in memory to him. He's my animal guardian. Huh…anyways, I got to go…Bye!

READ AND REVIEW, PLEASE!


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